Harry, your mummy can’t sing. Nowadays I don’t have a problem with it but it’s not always been that way. I vividly remember the time in primary school that I had to stand next to the music teachers piano and sing “The Lord of the Dance” and much to the amusement of my fellow classmates I was stopped before I hit the chorus. Until I hit my twenties and Dolly Parton came in to my life I shunned away from any form of sing-along.
When you were born I realised I may have to confront my fear of performing in public, in daylight, and without any form of crutch. My idea of hell came in the form of baby sensory classes. Thankfully as we all made our way to the mat and the music struck up, a quick glance around confirmed that the other mums quite clearly shared my concerns. When we burst in to song the local cats scattered in a million different directions. I will be amazed if you ever recognise “Row, row, row your boat” or “Twinkle twinkle little star” when it is sung correctly. Your little cheeky face continued to smile lovingly at me as I tried and failed to hit the high notes. During those sessions I can honestly say you were doing more for my confidence and development than I was doing for yours.
But recently I have noticed a change in your behaviour. We found ourselves at a kids sing and play session recently where for 35 minutes out of the 45 you played on the slide in the corner. This meant I was singing nursery rhymes to some poor other woman’s traumatised child. I thought you just really liked that slide, but was it more than that, have you rumbled me?
All I ask is that you be gentler with me than my niece was with pointing out my sister’s failings. During a particularly painful rendition of “Away in a Manger” my sister was stopped by my niece who very matter of factly stated “Mummy please stop singing as you are singing it all wrong. My ears hurt”. My sister was then relieved of singing duties and everyone else within a 100 metre radius expressed their relief. My promise to you is that to save you future embarrassment I will save my very best efforts for in the car and for when I am out with friends. But you have to promise me that you will join me in “You’ll Never Walk Alone”, “Land of My Fathers” and of course “Jolene”! Have we a deal?
Harry’s Honest Mummy x